If I Had Legs I'd Kick You

In the wind‑blown seaside town of Montauk, Linda tries to keep the pieces of her life from slipping through the cracks. By day she sits behind a therapist’s desk, listening to strangers teeter on the edge of collapse, while by night she wrestles with a far more intimate crisis: caring for a daughter whose fragile health is tethered to a nightly feeding tube. The cramped apartment they call home feels both a sanctuary and a pressure cooker, especially after a sudden structural failure forces them into a shabby motel that mirrors the disarray blooming inside.

Linda’s professional world is a mirror of her personal turmoil. Her clients arrive with raw, unfiltered panic—new mothers abandoning babies, spouses trapped in silence, and other fractured souls that echo her own sense of helplessness. The very act of trying to help becomes a tightrope, and even the therapist she turns to for guidance begins to slip away as the boundaries between caretaker and patient blur. The tension crackles in every session, making the office feel less like a place of healing and more like a battlefield of unspoken grievances.

In the motel’s dim hallway, Linda encounters a cast of unlikely companions. Diana, a sharp‑tongued clerk, offers sardonic commentary that cuts through the fog of exhaustion, while James, the building’s superintendent, drifts in and out of her orbit with an odd mixture of practicality and chaos. Their presence adds a strange, almost cathartic rhythm to her days, providing fleeting moments of connection amid a landscape of uncertainty.

All the while, the looming absence of Charles—her husband, whose brief, critical phone calls offer little solace—casts a long shadow over the fragile equilibrium she strives to maintain. Between the therapist’s own unraveling, a missing‑person mystery that whispers in the background, and the relentless drive to keep her child alive, the film settles into a tense, intimate portrait of a woman caught between duty and desperation, searching for a foothold in a world that feels constantly on the brink of collapse.

Last Updated: December 03, 2025 at 23:30