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Plot Summary

Dear Ex (2019) Plot Summary Explained

Release, runtime and language
2019 · 100 min · Chinese
Echo score 80
JustWatch #33,990 1
Directed by
Chih-Yen Hsu, Mag Hsu
Starring
Ai-Lun Kao, Cheng-Chun Liang, Fang Wan, Hsin-Ling Chung, Joseph Huang, Kaier

When Sanlian's ex-husband unexpectedly dies, she is shocked to discover he has altered his will, disinheriting their son and leaving his estate to a mysterious stranger. Determined to challenge this decision, Sanlian finds herself in a fierce rivalry. However, as her son develops an unexpected connection with the new arrival, she is compelled to reconsider her assumptions about family, love, and what truly matters.

On this page (6)
  1. 1 Where to watch
  2. 2 What happens: full plot
  3. 3 Plot questions answered
  4. 4 Movie threads
  5. 5 Movies like Dear Ex
  6. 6 Every angle

Where to watch

Where to Watch Dear Ex (2019)

Where can you watch Dear Ex? Stream, rent or buy it in the US, including on Netflix and Netflix Standard: current JustWatch availability with up-to-date prices.

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Full plot summary · contains spoilers

What Happens in Dear Ex: Full Plot Summary

The whole story of Dear Ex (2019) explained, from the opening scene to the final frame: every key event, every twist and what it all adds up to. Read it as a quick recap before the sequel, to check a scene you missed, or to finally understand what really happened.

When San-lian's ex-husband, Zheng-yuan, passes away, she uncovers the shocking truth that he has made changes to his insurance policy, excluding their son from the benefits and instead favoring his male partner, Jay (Roy Chiu). Filled with anger and disbelief, San-lian confronts Jay at his apartment, demanding that he return the money to them. However, Jay firmly refuses to comply, intensifying the already fraught situation.

Meanwhile, San-lian’s son, Cheng-xi (Joseph Huang), struggles with the relationship he has with his mother. He often feels that her primary concern is the insurance payout rather than their family. To cope with his emotions, he attends therapy sessions at school. In the heat of an argument after his mother discards his father's memorabilia, Cheng-xi decides to leave home unexpectedly, opting to live with Jay. This shift places Jay in a position of responsibility, and he reluctantly begins to care for the troubled teenager. Cheng-xi shadows Jay throughout the day, witnessing his life as a theatre director.

Through flashbacks, the backstory unfolds between Jay and Zheng-yuan — originally coworkers in the theatre, they became lovers before Zheng-yuan chose to conceal his true self and marry San-lian to start a family. Tragically, after becoming ill, Zheng-yuan departed from his family to spend his final days with Jay.

San-lian persistently visits her son at Jay’s apartment, attempting to persuade him to return home. During one of these encounters, she inadvertently meets Jay’s mother, who remains oblivious to her son's sexual orientation. In a calculated bid for money, she enters Jay's rehearsal space and threatens to reveal his secret unless he hands over the insurance funds. Despite the threat, she divulges his truth to her son anyway.

As tensions escalate, Jay faces a brutal ambush from a group of men who leave him injured with a broken leg. Cheng-xi finds him in this vulnerable state and immediately tells his mother, who rushes Jay to the hospital. It comes to light that Jay had previously turned to loan sharks for financial assistance to help Zheng-yuan receive a liver transplant, which sadly proved ineffective.

Despite his injury, Jay is determined to perform in his theatrical debut. Following a hurried return to the theatre, San-lian and Cheng-xi attend the performance, witnessing Jay’s talent on stage. After the show, an emotional moment occurs when Jay’s mother presents him with flowers, signifying her acceptance of him as he and Jay share a heartfelt embrace. In a surprising twist, San-lian ultimately decides to let Jay keep the insurance money, fostering a moment of reconciliation as Cheng-xi moves back in with his mother, bringing a semblance of peace to their complicated lives.

Last updated: November 16, 2024 at 15:00

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Plot questions answered

Dear Ex Plot Explained: Your Questions Answered

The questions people ask most about Dear Ex (2019): what happens in the confusing scenes, why the characters do what they do, the twists, hidden details and what the ending means. Each answer contains spoilers.

Q1

Why did Zheng-yuan leave his insurance money to Jay instead of his son?

Zheng-yuan changed his insurance policy to name Jay as the beneficiary because Jay was his actual partner. The flashbacks reveal that Zheng-yuan had been living a double life, he was gay but married San-lian to conceal his true identity. When he became terminally ill, he left his family to spend his final days with Jay, and wanted to ensure Jay would be financially secure after his death.

Foreshadowing: Earlier scenes hint at Zheng-yuan's distant behavior during his marriage, suggesting he was never fully present in his family life.

  • Zheng-yuan insurance policy
  • Jay beneficiary
  • will inheritance
  • gay relationship secret life
Q2

Why did Cheng-xi choose to live with Jay instead of staying with his mother?

Cheng-xi moved in with Jay after a heated argument where San-lian discarded his father's memorabilia. He felt his mother cared more about the insurance money than about family, and he was angry that she was fighting to take money from the one person his father actually loved. Living with Jay also gave him a connection to his deceased father.

Foreshadowing: Cheng-xi's therapy sessions earlier reveal his feeling of neglect and that his mother prioritizes money over emotional connection.

  • Cheng-xi moves with Jay
  • mother son conflict
  • family tension
  • insurance money dispute
Q3

Why was Jay attacked and beaten?

Jay was attacked by loan sharks he had borrowed money from. Years earlier, when Zheng-yuan was dying from a liver condition, Jay desperately borrowed money from illegal lenders to fund a liver transplant for him. Despite the surgery failing, Jay was left with a massive debt that the loan sharks came to collect, resulting in the brutal ambush.

Foreshadowing: Jay's financial struggles are hinted at when San-lian first visits his apartment and notices his modest living conditions.

  • Jay attacked
  • loan sharks
  • Zheng-yuan liver transplant
  • debt money
Q4

Why did San-lian finally let Jay keep the insurance money?

After witnessing Jay's theatrical debut and seeing his talent and resilience, and especially after seeing Jay's mother accept him with flowers, San-lian realized the money was never really about the amount. She understood that Zheng-yuan genuinely loved Jay and that fighting over the inheritance was perpetuating the same cycle of deception and pain. Her decision marked her acceptance of the truth and a choice to move forward.

Foreshadowing: San-lian's gradual shift is visible through her increasing willingness to understand Jay's life and her own reflections during visits to the apartment.

  • San-lian reconciliation
  • Jay keeps money
  • insurance settlement
  • acceptance forgiveness
Q5

How did Jay and Zheng-yuan meet and fall in love?

Jay and Zheng-yuan were originally coworkers at a theatre company. They worked together and eventually became lovers. When Zheng-yuan decided to marry San-lian and start a conventional family, he concealed his true self and his relationship with Jay, forcing Jay to remain a hidden partner throughout the years.

Foreshadowing: The theatre setting is established early when Cheng-xi shadows Jay as a director, hinting at the connection to Zheng-yuan's past.

  • Jay Zheng-yuan relationship
  • theatre coworkers
  • love story hidden identity
Q6

What triggered Cheng-xi to leave home?

Cheng-xi decided to leave home after an argument with San-lian where she discarded his father's memorabilia. This act symbolized to him that his mother was only interested in the financial aspects of his father's death rather than preserving his memory. The argument was the final straw after months of feeling neglected and caught in the middle of the inheritance battle.

Foreshadowing: Cheng-xi's therapy sessions and his expressed feelings that his mother cares about money establish his emotional fragility.

  • Cheng-xi runs away
  • argument with mother
  • father memorabilia
  • family conflict
Q7

Why did Jay borrow money from loan sharks?

Jay borrowed money from illegal loan sharks to pay for Zheng-yuan's liver transplant when he became terminally ill. Despite knowing the surgery was risky and expensive, Jay was desperate to save the man he loved. The transplant ultimately failed, but Jay was left with a crushing debt that he struggled to repay.

Foreshadowing: Jay's financial desperation is subtly suggested earlier when he refuses to give up the insurance money, it's his only chance to clear his debt.

  • loan sharks debt
  • liver transplant
  • Zheng-yuan illness
  • financial desperation
Q8

What happened between Jay and his mother at the theatre?

After Jay's theatrical debut, his mother came to the performance and presented him with flowers, a gesture symbolizing her acceptance of him despite learning about his sexual orientation. This moment is particularly significant because she had previously been unaware of his true self, and the flowers represented her love and approval, leading to an emotional embrace on stage.

Foreshadowing: San-lian's earlier encounter with Jay's mother, where she considered threatening to expose Jay's secret, sets up the stakes of this reconciliation.

  • Jay mother acceptance
  • flowers theatre
  • gay acceptance
  • family reconciliation lgbtq
Q9

Why did San-lian threaten to expose Jay's secret?

San-lian threatened to reveal Jay's sexual orientation to his mother unless he handed over the insurance money. Desperate to secure financial security for her son and feeling betrayed by both her deceased husband and Jay, she resorted to manipulation. However, her threat was hollow, she ultimately told Cheng-xi about Jay's secret anyway, showing her conflicted state between revenge and truth.

Foreshadowing: Her desperation is visible throughout the film as she repeatedly visits Jay's apartment, showing her inability to let go of the financial matter.

  • San-lian threat
  • expose Jay secret
  • blackmail insurance
  • sexual orientation reveal
Q10

What does the ending of Dear Ex mean?

The ending represents a bittersweet reconciliation. San-lian chooses to let go of her anger and allows Jay to keep the insurance money, recognizing that her late husband truly loved him. Cheng-xi moves back home, restoring some normalcy to their family. However, this peace comes after profound loss, Zheng-yuan is gone, years of deception have been revealed, and the family must now rebuild with the painful truths acknowledged. It's not a happy ending but a hopeful one built on acceptance.

Foreshadowing: The film's steady pacing and gradual character shifts throughout prepare viewers for this nuanced resolution rather than a dramatic turnaround.

  • Dear Ex ending explained
  • reconciliation meaning
  • family healing
  • bittersweet resolution

Movie threads

More Movies Like Dear Ex, by Mood & Story

Curated lists built around what makes Dear Ex tick: the same mood, the same kind of story or the same emotional payoff. Each list explains why these movies belong together.

Movies about families forged from secrets like Dear Ex

Unconventional families form when death reveals a hidden life. If you enjoyed Dear Ex, you might like these movies where a death reveals a hidden life, forcing families to reconcile with the past and form unexpected new bonds. These dramas focus on the complex relationships that emerge from posthumous secrets, blending grief with reluctant acceptance.

  • revealing
  • contemplative
  • cathartic
  • melancholic
  • grieving
  • resentful
  • Tone: bittersweet, contemplative
  • Pacing: steady, character-driven
Why these movies?

The story pattern: The narrative typically begins with a death that acts as a catalyst, revealing a secret life or relationship that disrupts the survivors' world. The conflict stems from this revelation, pitting established family against the newly discovered one. The story arc moves from initial shock and resentment towards a gradual, often difficult, acceptance, resulting in a redefined, more complex family unit.

Why they belong together: These films are grouped together because they share a core focus on family dynamics reshaped by posthumous revelations. They balance heavy emotional themes like grief and betrayal with character-driven journeys toward reconciliation, creating a specific, bittersweet viewing experience centered on the messy, imperfect nature of love and family.

Movies about reluctant acceptance like Dear Ex

Stories where anger slowly gives way to a difficult, healing peace. Discover more movies like Dear Ex that focus on characters who begin with fierce opposition but are slowly compelled to reconsider their stance. These films feature bittersweet journeys where initial conflict evolves into a deeper, more complex understanding of others and themselves.

  • cathartic
  • contemplative
  • resentful
  • melancholic
  • heated
  • revealing
  • Tone: bittersweet, cathartic
  • Pacing: steady, reflective
Why these movies?

The story pattern: The plot is driven by a character's strong initial stance against a person or situation. Through forced proximity or unexpected interactions, their rigid worldview is challenged. The narrative avoids a simple resolution, instead focusing on the internal struggle of the protagonist as they move from denial and anger towards a nuanced, reluctant acceptance that changes them fundamentally.

Why they belong together: These movies are united by a specific character arc: the transition from stubborn opposition to mature acceptance. They share a bittersweet tone, as this growth is usually paired with the acknowledgment of irreversible loss or past mistakes. The pacing is typically steady, allowing the character's change of heart to feel earned and authentic.

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Every angle

Dear Ex (2019) Explained: Plot, Timeline & Characters

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