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Dear Ex (2019) Timeline Explained – Every Event in Order

Release, runtime and language
2019 · 100 min · Chinese
Echo score 80
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Directed by
Chih-Yen Hsu, Mag Hsu
Starring
Ai-Lun Kao, Cheng-Chun Liang, Fang Wan, Hsin-Ling Chung, Joseph Huang, Kaier

When Sanlian's ex-husband unexpectedly dies, she is shocked to discover he has altered his will, disinheriting their son and leaving his estate to a mysterious stranger. Determined to challenge this decision, Sanlian finds herself in a fierce rivalry. However, as her son develops an unexpected connection with the new arrival, she is compelled to reconsider her assumptions about family, love, and what truly matters.

On this page (6)
  1. 1 Where to watch
  2. 2 Events in order (15)
  3. 3 Timeline questions answered
  4. 4 Movie threads
  5. 5 Movies like Dear Ex
  6. 6 Every angle
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15 events in order · contains spoilers

Dear Ex Timeline: Events in Chronological Order

Every key event of Dear Ex (2019) in order, scene by scene, with when and where it takes place. Use it to untangle flashbacks, time jumps and parallel storylines, to refresh your memory before the sequel or to find the exact scene you are thinking of.

  1. Zheng-yuan's Death

    San-lian's ex-husband, Zheng-yuan, passes away unexpectedly, triggering a series of events. This loss leaves San-lian in shock, and she begins to dig into the details of his life and financial arrangements.

  2. Insurance Policy Changes

    Upon reviewing the insurance policy, San-lian discovers that Zheng-yuan changed the beneficiary to his male partner, Jay, leaving their son, Cheng-xi, out completely. This revelation intensifies her feelings of betrayal and anger towards both Zheng-yuan and Jay.

  3. Confrontation with Jay

    Filled with rage, San-lian confronts Jay at his apartment, demanding that he return the insurance money intended for their son. Jay, however, firmly refuses her entreaties, exacerbating the tension between them.

    Where
    Jay's apartment
  4. Cheng-xi's Emotional Struggles

    Cheng-xi grapples with his relationship with San-lian, feeling that her primary interest is the insurance payout rather than familial bonds. He copes with his emotional turmoil by seeking therapy sessions at school, illustrating his internal struggle.

  5. Cheng-xi Leaves Home

    After a heated argument where San-lian discards his father's memorabilia, Cheng-xi decides to leave home unexpectedly. He chooses to move in with Jay, significantly shifting the dynamics among the three of them.

  6. Jay Takes Responsibility

    With Cheng-xi now living with him, Jay finds himself in a new role as the caretaker of the troubled teen. Despite his initial reluctance, he begins to care for Cheng-xi, who shadows him as he navigates life as a theatre director.

  7. Flashbacks of Jay and Zheng-yuan

    The narrative utilizes flashbacks to reveal the backstory between Jay and Zheng-yuan. The audience learns of their early days as coworkers who became lovers, culminating in Zheng-yuan's decision to marry San-lian and live a double life.

  8. San-lian's Attempt to Reconnect

    San-lian persistently visits her son at Jay’s apartment in efforts to persuade him to return home. During one of these visits, she accidentally meets Jay’s mother, who is unaware of her son's true sexual orientation, which complicates matters further.

    Where
    Jay's apartment
  9. Threat and Revelation

    In a bid for financial gain, San-lian threatens to expose Jay's sexual orientation unless he gives her the insurance money. Ironically, she confesses his secret to Cheng-xi anyway, adding tension to the already volatile situation.

    Where
    The rehearsal space
  10. Jay's Attack and Injury

    Jay becomes a victim of a brutal attack by a group of men who leave him seriously injured with a broken leg. Cheng-xi discovers Jay in this vulnerable state and hurriedly informs his mother, triggering a sense of urgency.

  11. Hospital Visit

    San-lian rushes Jay to the hospital after learning of his injury. It is during this visit that they uncover the harsh reality of Jay's financial struggles, having previously borrowed money to finance Zheng-yuan's liver transplant.

    Where
    Hospital
  12. Jay's Theatrical Debut

    Despite his injury, Jay remains determined to perform in his theatrical debut. San-lian and Cheng-xi attend the performance, moved by Jay's talent on stage, showcasing his resilience and dedication to his art.

    Where
    Theatre
  13. Emotional Acceptance

    After the performance, an emotional moment unfolds when Jay's mother presents him with flowers, symbolizing her acceptance of him. This gesture marks a pivotal point in their relationship as Jay and his mother share a heartfelt embrace on stage.

    Where
    Theatre
  14. Reconciliation

    In a surprising twist, San-lian ultimately chooses to let Jay keep the insurance money. This decision fosters a sense of reconciliation between them, with San-lian and Cheng-xi moving towards a more peaceful and understanding relationship.

  15. Cheng-xi Returns Home

    As a result of the reconciliatory atmosphere, Cheng-xi decides to move back in with his mother. This decision signifies a new chapter for their family, as they strive for healing amid the complexities of their lives.

Last updated: November 16, 2024 at 15:00

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Timeline questions answered

Dear Ex Timeline Explained: Your Questions Answered

When does it happen, and why in that order? The questions people ask about the chronology of Dear Ex (2019): time jumps, flashbacks, cause and effect between scenes and the correct order of events, each answered with spoilers.

Q1

Why did Zheng-yuan leave his insurance money to Jay instead of his son?

Zheng-yuan changed his insurance policy to name Jay as the beneficiary because Jay was his actual partner. The flashbacks reveal that Zheng-yuan had been living a double life, he was gay but married San-lian to conceal his true identity. When he became terminally ill, he left his family to spend his final days with Jay, and wanted to ensure Jay would be financially secure after his death.

Foreshadowing: Earlier scenes hint at Zheng-yuan's distant behavior during his marriage, suggesting he was never fully present in his family life.

  • Zheng-yuan insurance policy
  • Jay beneficiary
  • will inheritance
  • gay relationship secret life
Q2

Why did Cheng-xi choose to live with Jay instead of staying with his mother?

Cheng-xi moved in with Jay after a heated argument where San-lian discarded his father's memorabilia. He felt his mother cared more about the insurance money than about family, and he was angry that she was fighting to take money from the one person his father actually loved. Living with Jay also gave him a connection to his deceased father.

Foreshadowing: Cheng-xi's therapy sessions earlier reveal his feeling of neglect and that his mother prioritizes money over emotional connection.

  • Cheng-xi moves with Jay
  • mother son conflict
  • family tension
  • insurance money dispute
Q3

Why was Jay attacked and beaten?

Jay was attacked by loan sharks he had borrowed money from. Years earlier, when Zheng-yuan was dying from a liver condition, Jay desperately borrowed money from illegal lenders to fund a liver transplant for him. Despite the surgery failing, Jay was left with a massive debt that the loan sharks came to collect, resulting in the brutal ambush.

Foreshadowing: Jay's financial struggles are hinted at when San-lian first visits his apartment and notices his modest living conditions.

  • Jay attacked
  • loan sharks
  • Zheng-yuan liver transplant
  • debt money
Q4

Why did San-lian finally let Jay keep the insurance money?

After witnessing Jay's theatrical debut and seeing his talent and resilience, and especially after seeing Jay's mother accept him with flowers, San-lian realized the money was never really about the amount. She understood that Zheng-yuan genuinely loved Jay and that fighting over the inheritance was perpetuating the same cycle of deception and pain. Her decision marked her acceptance of the truth and a choice to move forward.

Foreshadowing: San-lian's gradual shift is visible through her increasing willingness to understand Jay's life and her own reflections during visits to the apartment.

  • San-lian reconciliation
  • Jay keeps money
  • insurance settlement
  • acceptance forgiveness
Q5

How did Jay and Zheng-yuan meet and fall in love?

Jay and Zheng-yuan were originally coworkers at a theatre company. They worked together and eventually became lovers. When Zheng-yuan decided to marry San-lian and start a conventional family, he concealed his true self and his relationship with Jay, forcing Jay to remain a hidden partner throughout the years.

Foreshadowing: The theatre setting is established early when Cheng-xi shadows Jay as a director, hinting at the connection to Zheng-yuan's past.

  • Jay Zheng-yuan relationship
  • theatre coworkers
  • love story hidden identity
Q6

What triggered Cheng-xi to leave home?

Cheng-xi decided to leave home after an argument with San-lian where she discarded his father's memorabilia. This act symbolized to him that his mother was only interested in the financial aspects of his father's death rather than preserving his memory. The argument was the final straw after months of feeling neglected and caught in the middle of the inheritance battle.

Foreshadowing: Cheng-xi's therapy sessions and his expressed feelings that his mother cares about money establish his emotional fragility.

  • Cheng-xi runs away
  • argument with mother
  • father memorabilia
  • family conflict
Q7

Why did Jay borrow money from loan sharks?

Jay borrowed money from illegal loan sharks to pay for Zheng-yuan's liver transplant when he became terminally ill. Despite knowing the surgery was risky and expensive, Jay was desperate to save the man he loved. The transplant ultimately failed, but Jay was left with a crushing debt that he struggled to repay.

Foreshadowing: Jay's financial desperation is subtly suggested earlier when he refuses to give up the insurance money, it's his only chance to clear his debt.

  • loan sharks debt
  • liver transplant
  • Zheng-yuan illness
  • financial desperation
Q8

What happened between Jay and his mother at the theatre?

After Jay's theatrical debut, his mother came to the performance and presented him with flowers, a gesture symbolizing her acceptance of him despite learning about his sexual orientation. This moment is particularly significant because she had previously been unaware of his true self, and the flowers represented her love and approval, leading to an emotional embrace on stage.

Foreshadowing: San-lian's earlier encounter with Jay's mother, where she considered threatening to expose Jay's secret, sets up the stakes of this reconciliation.

  • Jay mother acceptance
  • flowers theatre
  • gay acceptance
  • family reconciliation lgbtq
Q9

Why did San-lian threaten to expose Jay's secret?

San-lian threatened to reveal Jay's sexual orientation to his mother unless he handed over the insurance money. Desperate to secure financial security for her son and feeling betrayed by both her deceased husband and Jay, she resorted to manipulation. However, her threat was hollow, she ultimately told Cheng-xi about Jay's secret anyway, showing her conflicted state between revenge and truth.

Foreshadowing: Her desperation is visible throughout the film as she repeatedly visits Jay's apartment, showing her inability to let go of the financial matter.

  • San-lian threat
  • expose Jay secret
  • blackmail insurance
  • sexual orientation reveal
Q10

What does the ending of Dear Ex mean?

The ending represents a bittersweet reconciliation. San-lian chooses to let go of her anger and allows Jay to keep the insurance money, recognizing that her late husband truly loved him. Cheng-xi moves back home, restoring some normalcy to their family. However, this peace comes after profound loss, Zheng-yuan is gone, years of deception have been revealed, and the family must now rebuild with the painful truths acknowledged. It's not a happy ending but a hopeful one built on acceptance.

Foreshadowing: The film's steady pacing and gradual character shifts throughout prepare viewers for this nuanced resolution rather than a dramatic turnaround.

  • Dear Ex ending explained
  • reconciliation meaning
  • family healing
  • bittersweet resolution

Movie threads

More Movies Like Dear Ex, by Mood & Story

Curated lists built around what makes Dear Ex tick: the same mood, the same kind of story or the same emotional payoff. Each list explains why these movies belong together.

Movies about families forged from secrets like Dear Ex

Unconventional families form when death reveals a hidden life. If you enjoyed Dear Ex, you might like these movies where a death reveals a hidden life, forcing families to reconcile with the past and form unexpected new bonds. These dramas focus on the complex relationships that emerge from posthumous secrets, blending grief with reluctant acceptance.

  • revealing
  • contemplative
  • cathartic
  • melancholic
  • grieving
  • resentful
  • Tone: bittersweet, contemplative
  • Pacing: steady, character-driven
Why these movies?

The story pattern: The narrative typically begins with a death that acts as a catalyst, revealing a secret life or relationship that disrupts the survivors' world. The conflict stems from this revelation, pitting established family against the newly discovered one. The story arc moves from initial shock and resentment towards a gradual, often difficult, acceptance, resulting in a redefined, more complex family unit.

Why they belong together: These films are grouped together because they share a core focus on family dynamics reshaped by posthumous revelations. They balance heavy emotional themes like grief and betrayal with character-driven journeys toward reconciliation, creating a specific, bittersweet viewing experience centered on the messy, imperfect nature of love and family.

Movies about reluctant acceptance like Dear Ex

Stories where anger slowly gives way to a difficult, healing peace. Discover more movies like Dear Ex that focus on characters who begin with fierce opposition but are slowly compelled to reconsider their stance. These films feature bittersweet journeys where initial conflict evolves into a deeper, more complex understanding of others and themselves.

  • cathartic
  • contemplative
  • resentful
  • melancholic
  • heated
  • revealing
  • Tone: bittersweet, cathartic
  • Pacing: steady, reflective
Why these movies?

The story pattern: The plot is driven by a character's strong initial stance against a person or situation. Through forced proximity or unexpected interactions, their rigid worldview is challenged. The narrative avoids a simple resolution, instead focusing on the internal struggle of the protagonist as they move from denial and anger towards a nuanced, reluctant acceptance that changes them fundamentally.

Why they belong together: These movies are united by a specific character arc: the transition from stubborn opposition to mature acceptance. They share a bittersweet tone, as this growth is usually paired with the acknowledgment of irreversible loss or past mistakes. The pacing is typically steady, allowing the character's change of heart to feel earned and authentic.

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Every angle

Dear Ex (2019) Explained: Plot, Timeline & Characters

Everything about Dear Ex in one place: what happens in the plot summary, the timeline in chronological order, the characters and meaning and a spoiler-free summary. What's After the Movie adds the cast, box office and post-credit scenes.

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