We Are Zombies

The movie opens in a world where humans coexist peacefully with zombies, who are considered second-class citizens due to their 'living-impaired' status. Maggie Neard, a small-time thief, intercepts a call to collect an unwanted zombie from the Coleman Corporation's Retirement Services for the Living-Impaired. This sets the scene for the conflict involving zombie treatment and illegal activities.

Maggie’s accomplice, Karl, and his friend Freddy, retrieve a zombie from the McKenna residence while posing as official collectors. During the pickup, the zombie bites a family member, forcing them to decapitate it to prevent further harm. The crew receives half payment from Don due to the damage caused during the incident.

Hannity, a strict officer for the Coleman Corporation, criticizes Stanley and Rocco for repeatedly allowing Maggie and her crew to interfere with their zombie collection assignments. He orders them to recover the $25,000 they are owed, highlighting internal conflicts within the organization.

Freddy confesses to Karl that he wants to propose to Maggie with a flashy ring, revealing his longstanding crush on her. Karl, skeptical, points out Freddy and Maggie have not even dated, leading to a teasing argument where Freddy insults Karl's habits.

While confronting Karl and Freddy, Rocco accidentally shoots himself during the altercation, turning into a zombie. This incident prompts discussions about the dangers they face, especially since the crew is already in trouble with the law for their activities.

Karl, Maggie, and Freddy discover that Stanley and Rocco have kidnapped Mrs. Neard to blackmail for ransom. Desperate for money, they seek out Otto Maddox to steal the corpse of actress Debbie Jones, aiming to earn $50,000 from this illicit job.

Hannity presents 'Project Zoltan,' a gas designed to reengineer zombies, which disastrously causes test subjects' heads to explode. The project is initially terminated by Coleman, but after the CEO's death and subsequent zombie resurrection, Hannity uses the opportunity to push his control over the company.

The team infiltrates Country Hill Cemetery searching for Debbie Jones's body but finds it's too skeletal to reanimate. Maggie recognizes Stanley as her ex-boyfriend on a call for ransom, and rioting zombies are unleashed on the scene after the Project Zoltan gas is deployed, turning the environment chaotic.

Unable to reanimate Debbie due to her skeletal remains, Karl suggests using Jane, an undead online sex performer who resembles Zelvirella, to stand in for Debbie. The group persuades Jane to come with them for their plan amidst a series of misadventures and police encounters.

During Otto Maddox's performance art show, the zombies turn violent after Hannity releases the gas. Don escapes with Otto's money, and a series of fights ensue involving zombies, including the undead Mother Theresa, who kills Otto. Jane steals a briefcase as chaos unfolds.

The main characters are wrongly framed as bioterrorists following the zombie attack. Hannity is unmasked and captured, leading to an altercation where Freddy breaks his neck, but Hannity resurrects as a zombie and kills Freddy. Maggie decapitates Hannity in self-defense.

Stanley, revealed to be disguised as one of Hannity's henchmen, unmasks and threatens Hannity at gunpoint. After an intense fight, Freddy kills Hannity, who then reanimates as a zombie and shoots Freddy. Stanley steals the briefcase but gets bitten and turns into a zombie.

Two weeks later, the group survives in a diner after the world has become a zombie wasteland due to Hannity's viral gas. They navigate this new harsh environment with Maggie, Karl, Freddy, Jane, Mrs. Neard, and Rocco, while Stanley wanders the devastated landscape still holding the briefcase.