Notzilla

In What’s After the Movie, the story is set in 1962 and revolves around a giant monster named Notzilla, which is a mother kaiju that was killed by the Japan Self-Defense Force (JSDF) despite the protests of Dr. Itchihiro “Hiro” Honda, a passionate paleontologist who firmly believes he can save her and restore her to her original, smaller size. In his efforts, Dr. Honda rescues her egg and takes it to Ohio, aiming to find a way to reverse her growth. Unfortunately, during the transport, the egg is accidentally flushed down an airplane toilet, ejecting into the Ohio River, where it is discovered by scientists.

The scientists working at Cincinnati’s secret nuclear underground facility, called SNUGI, led by Dr. Richard Blowheart, begin investigating the egg after a nuclear test explosion causes unusual phenomena. They soon realize that the egg belongs to the species Notzillasaurus Partiontildon, which has a peculiar weakness: when it consumes alcohol, it grows to uncontrollable proportions. Later that day, the egg hatches, and Notzilla immediately starts drinking the numerous beers in Dr. Richard Blowheart’s possession, hinting at the bizarre link between alcohol consumption and its size.

As Notzilla grows exponentially, it escapes into the city, prompting a series of intense efforts by the SNUGI scientists to retrieve or neutralize the monster. The story introduces a curious character, Bobby, who believes Notzilla has killed his grandfather. In his desperation and anger, Bobby tries to confront the monster with a handgun but ultimately learns his grandfather is still alive, leading him to abandon his attack. His startled reaction causes Notzilla to flee, providing a brief break in the chaos.

Hiro, feeling responsible for Notzilla’s presence in America, pleads to save the monster, while Richard advocates for its destruction. When conventional military methods like rockets, shells, and missiles prove ineffective against Notzilla, which is depicted as virtually unstoppable—knocking over vehicles and soldiers as if they were toys—Richard contacts the Pentagon for assistance. Due to the Cuban Missile Crisis and the limited options available, he manages to reach only Frigidair General Dirk Bogus, a satirical character who is the head of military refrigeration for southwestern Ohio rather than a traditional military figure.

The armed forces are powerless against Notzilla, who tears through the city streets and demolishes military equipment. A squadron of fighter jets is dispatched but fails to stop the creature, as Notzilla easily destroys the wires from which they are hanging. As Notzilla heads toward Cincinnati, Bogus suggests using Richard’s secret weapon, the Super-Secret Uber-Fission Mega Blaster, which Richard proudly unveils, despite its dangerous side effects—potentially irradiating Cincinnati for decades.

Meanwhile, Hiro confronts Richard and, using his black belt in haiku, immobilizes him with a poetic rant that emphasizes the absurdity of the situation. Shirley Yujest, one of the scientists, introduces her theory of warm fusion, which might hold the key to returning Notzilla to normal size. Together, they attempt to develop an “anti-beer” formula, exploiting Notzilla’s peculiar dependence on alcohol.

As Notzilla wreaks havoc on the city—peeling passengers off a moving train, inhaling fire with fiery burps, and causing destruction—the scientists, including Hiro, work tirelessly to solve the crisis. They try to lure Notzilla away by using the anti-beer formula stored inside an enormous beer can and rallying efforts to create a massive trap. Despite their attempts, Notzilla continues to menace Cincinnati, even reaching into the streets with fiery emissions and spray pee to put out fires he unintentionally sets.

In a surprising turn, Shirley reveals a shocking secret: Richard is not a real scientist but a former child actor named Donnie Draper. This revelation delights some characters and horrifies others, leading to sabotage of the Mega-Blaster as the scientists lose confidence in the weapon. They set their hopes on a dramatic showdown at Big Finale Ridge, but the device shorts out due to sabotage.

Notzilla then unexpectedly brings a bouquet of trees to Shirley, indicating a more gentle side. Hiro arrives with an enormous beer can containing the anti-beer formula, and after drinking it, Notzilla shrinks back to his normal size. However, the story takes a comedic twist as Dr. Butay unveils a secret power switch, which leads to a chaotic moment where the entire cast, in a Spartacus-style revolt, proclaims themselves Notzilla to distract the monster. Hiro rams a beer can with his truck, knocking it into the death-ray’s path, causing it to spray the formula onto Butay and Richard/Draper, shrinking both to doll size.

The story concludes with 4-Star General Specific arriving, tipped off by intrepid reporter Pearl Stringer, and appointing Shirley as the new head of SNUGI and Hiro as the director of the Pentagon’s Giant Monster Protection Program, emphasizing the importance of preparing for future threats—if there are any. In the aftermath, Shirley and Hiro adopt Notzilla, who now carries Dr. Butay and Donnie in a toy car, symbolizing their victory. Just as Hiro asks about adopting more children, three new Notzilla eggs are found floating ashore, leaving the story open-ended and hinting at possible new adventures or chaos ahead.

“Well, guess I’d better start working on that sequel now,” might be the kind of witty remark fitting this bizarre yet charming tale of giant monsters, scientific mishaps, and comedic heroism.

Last Updated: August 19, 2025 at 05:12