Bill Higgins [Steven Cooke] is a down-on-his-luck nerd who needs cash to go to medical school, so he takes a job as the school basketball team's towel boy. At the gym he spots Krissi [Lezlie Z. McCraw], a crush he has carried since seventh grade, and his first day ends with humiliation as the team treats him poorly. A chaotic mishap follows when he accidentally dumps rancid milk over Tony [Rick McDowell] and Krissi just as they’re about to have sex behind the gym. The embarrassing incident pushes Bill to quit and fall back on collecting recycling for spare change.
While trying to toss a beer bottle into a dumpster, he discovers a bottle that contains Lepkey [Garry Kluger], a leprechaun imprisoned for drunken mischief. To escape his confinement, Lepkey offers Bill a deal: in exchange for freedom, he will grant three wishes. For his first wish, Bill asks for a date with Krissi, and the request is granted. But on the evening itself, Krissi ditches Bill and instead hooks up with Tony, leaving Bill feeling used and frustrated. In an effort to make amends for the botched first wish, Lepkey grants a second wish: a brand-new car, which turns out to be a bright red Pinto that changes Bill’s possibilities and confidence.
Krissi, feeling a pang of guilt, agrees to a genuine date with Bill for a round of miniature golf. Afterward, Bill discovers Tony speeding toward Krissi’s house, and to keep her safe, he asks Lepkey to turn him into a cat so he can slip inside unnoticed. The plan works, but when Tony arrives and tries to assault Krissi, Bill, now in cat form, and Krissi’s mother intervene just in time, prompting the police to arrest Tony.
The next day, Bill’s Pinto refuses to start, so he bikes to pick Krissi up instead. A misfired third wish goes wrong in a comic yet troubling way: Bill is shrunk down and ends up trapped in Krissi’s underwear as she rides to school, unable to escape. After cheerleading practice, he’s returned to normal size in the women’s locker room, which gets him into some trouble, yet Bill and Krissi decide to go steady after school.
For his third wish, Bill asks Lepkey for enough money to fund medical school, and Lepkey grants the request by sending a sizeable sum back to Ireland. That night Bill proposes to Krissi, and she happily says yes. They marry, but the wedding’s glow is interrupted when Tony kidnaps Krissi. Bill gives chase, leading to a bizarre and tense sword-fight with shish kabobs, during which Tony accidentally stirs up a wasp nest and is defeated. After the chase, Bill recounts the full tale of Lepkey and the three wishes to Krissi. Krissi initially accuses him of deception, but at that precise moment Lepkey appears in the non-alcoholic sparkling wine bottle Bill had purchased, confirming the entire unbelievable story. Krissi’s doubt gives way to astonishment as the magical twist lands in their hands, closing the loop on a wild, mischievous romance.
