Oh Schucks…! Here Comes UNTAG

Kwagga Robertse runs a farm shop in Nambabwe and routinely cons tourists by pretending to kill a lion, earning him the nickname Urumbo from the locals. The trick brings him money and gives him leverage over outsiders who come to buy livestock or goods. His persona helps him manipulate others in the country’s volatile landscape.

The United Nations Transition Assistance Group arrives to monitor the peace process and ensure free elections after the war. American Major Braddock D. Mackay and Captain Zapman are drawn into a scheme: a valuable diamond must be paid to Doon Robertse, Kwagga’s competitive brother, to secure the farm left by their father. The deal begins the corruption threading through the camp.

Mackay secretly decides to steal the natives’ cattle and sell them to rogue guerrillas across the northern border, revealing his greed and undermining the mission. His plan destabilizes the fragile peace and sows mistrust among local communities. This sets up Kwagga’s later counter-moves.

Inge Liefson, a lieutenant-doctor for UNTA G, is kidnapped by guerrillas during a raid. Kwagga tracks down the captors and rescues her, using the act to threaten his brother about buying the farm. The rescue also deepens Kwagga’s feelings for Inge.

Having fallen for Inge, Kwagga resolves to ruin Mackay’s platoon on the day of the peace inspection as payback for the betrayal. He begins planning a series of feints and disguises to overwhelm the visitors without triggering outright violence. The plan centers on exploiting the incompetence around the UN camp.

Kwagga disguises his ruses by targeting Joop Hendrick van den Ploes, a springbok-obsessed Hollander, with a staged kill of a springbok and coats him in animal blood. Fleeing animals chase Joop into the base, creating chaos and embarrassment for the UN platoon. The prank showcases Kwagga’s cunning rather than violence.

Kwagga again disguises himself as a high-ranking Indian officer to order Rashid, a Bangladeshi sergeant, to park and hide a tank. He claims it is a threat to UN peace efforts, exploiting the confusion and undermining the unit’s readiness. The stunt adds to the cascading failures surrounding the inspection.

In another ruse, Kwagga disguises himself and arranges the sale of fake rhino horn to a horn-obsessed Japanese soldier. The deception feeds the belief that the platoon is surrounded by opportunistic scavengers and corruptible buyers. These scams push the idea that the UN effort is surrounded by tricksters.

Mackay ignores an agreement with his sidekick Zapman, who retaliates by blowing up Mackay’s office to try stealing the diamond they purchased with the stolen cattle. The sabotage reveals how fragile control of the operation has become. The incident foreshadows a total collapse of the mission’s leadership.

With the sabotage unraveling, the UNTA G platoon is disbanded. Kwagga and Inge finally express their feelings for each other, turning personal resolution into a bittersweet victory after the chaos. The camp gathers amid the fallout of the failed mission.

Mackay and Zapman wander the Nambabwe desert with the purported diamond, only to discover that it is a forgery. The pair argue about who is to blame for the failed deal, further eroding trust between them. The revelation underscores the hollowness of their exploits.

In a final comic catastrophe, Kwagga accidentally triggers a cannon used to chase baboons, blasting Mackay and Zapman to smithereens. The explosion ends the film in an absurd reversal of expectations. Kwagga’s vendetta concludes with a bang rather than a direct confrontation.