New York City bus driver Ralph Kramden (Cedric the Entertainer) and his spirited wife Alice (Gabrielle Union) face the daunting challenge of making ends meet in the bustling city. Despite Ralph's numerous schemes aimed at striking it rich—like the Y2K survival kit, a trendy pet cactus, a clever Velcro fanny pack, and discounted Mets merchandise—they have managed to save a modest sum.
Alongside their closest friends Ed (Mike Epps) and Trixie Norton (Regina Hall), the pair is on the brink of securing a down payment for a duplex in Brooklyn. Alice and Trixie work as waitresses at a cozy diner, while Ed is employed in the sewer department. The duplex they hope to purchase belongs to the elderly Miss Benvenutti (Alice Drummond), who wishes to sell since she can no longer endure the harsh winters that New York brings.
With just two weeks remaining to gather the necessary funds—for which they must raise an additional $10,000 to reach a total of $20,000—pressure mounts. Alice resolves to ask her mother (Carol Woods) for the remaining money. One fateful night, while working in the sewers, Ed discovers a hidden shed harboring an exquisite, preserved train car, which he reveals to Ralph has just been put up for auction by the city. Inspired, Ralph devises a plan to renovate the train car and offer guided tours around New York City for tourists.
In their eagerness, Ralph and Ed decide to purchase the train, parting with the majority of their savings—$3,000—to secure it. They prevent another interested buyer, Lenny (Lenny Venito), from acquiring the train car, which turns out to be in decent condition but is located 60 feet below street level. However, upon realizing the exorbitant costs involved in retrieving the train, they devise a new scheme to recoup their investment. Unfortunately, their various endeavors—such as begging, searching for coins, soliciting donations while dressed as Brooklyn youth club representatives, and attempting hip hop dance routines on the streets—fail to generate the needed cash in time.
In a stroke of luck, Ralph and Ed find a fast-running greyhound dog in a dumpster. They decide to enter the dog into a race, driven by Ralph's excitement after witnessing its speed in the park. They enlist the help of track owner Kirby (Jon Polito), who informs them that the upcoming anniversary derby offers a $20,000 prize. Kirby agrees to time trial Ralph and Ed's dog, suggesting they seek out Dodge (John Leguizamo) for training. Despite the cost of $500 and the requirement that training occurs at night, Ralph concocts a story about a lodge job to keep Alice from suspecting his late-night outings with Ed.
Dodge's attempts to train the dog are met with challenges as it seems to only respond to the sight of a blue ball during their park visits. Eventually, with creativity and persistence, Ralph and Ed manage to make the dog race-ready, even spending $600 for the necessary paperwork. Meanwhile, Alice's mother unwittingly gives her a check for $10,000, mistakenly believing it complements their existing funds, only to erupt in anger when she discovers their accounts are nearly empty.
As the plot thickens, William (with private investigators hot on their trail) uncovers their scheme and pays off Kirby to prevent the dog from racing. With Ralph's moving speech about the down-and-out dumpster dog, he rallies enough support to reinstate the dog in the competition. However, during the critical race, Ed distracts the greyhound with its blue ball, leading to a devastating loss. Ralph's frustration results in a fight with Ed, further straining his already tenuous relationship with Alice.
As Ralph stands by the train—burning his previous failed business plans—he discovers a business card from the other interested buyer and resolves to sell it for $20,000 to salvage their dreams of home ownership. Just in time, they purchase the duplex before a developer can swoop in.
In a humorous twist, as they all relax in their backyard, the dog brings over a newspaper featuring the very train Ralph sold, which had now fetched a staggering $1 million after being sold again.
