After winning $10,000,000 from a scratchcard bought at the Quick Stop, Jay Jason Mewes and Silent Bob Kevin Smith decide to become Bluntman and Chronic, a playful spoof of Batman and Robin. They convert a secret Fortress of Solitude beneath RST Video into a fully equipped hideout, gathering the gadgets and gear they think will turn them into genuine crime-fighters. To keep everything running smoothly, they hire a loyal butler, Albert Neil Gaiman (the Manservant), who acts as their steady, if eccentric, helper in this comic-crusading adventure.
During their misadventures, they accidentally draw a group of powerful adversaries who band together as "The League of Shitters." The lineup features Lipstick Lesbian [Eliza Dushku], Dick Head [Ralph Garman], NewsGroup [Ben Gleib], Cocknocker [Tara Strong], and the Diddler [Brian Faraldo]. The League crashes a ceremony where Bluntman and Chronic are to receive the key to Red Bank, and the villainous crew knocks the heroes out. In a bold bid to infiltrate the Bluntcave, the League triggers a deadly consequences for NewsGroup and Diddler, who are crushed by a collapsing wall that seals the entrance. Lipstick Lesbian drives Albert into a fatal blow, and the villains leave Bluntman and Chronic to drown in a gigantic bong filling with water. Albert, however, summons the last of his strength to free the heroes before dying.
Driven by a vow of vengeance, Bluntman and Chronic mount the Blunt Jet and fly to Red Bank to save the city from The League’s mayhem. A climactic, over-the-top battle unfolds: Bluntman tricks Dick Head into slipping into a gay bar to disorient him, while Chronic defeats Cocknocker with a broken beer bottle. Lipstick Lesbian pulls a gun and aims at the duo, but they are unexpectedly saved by a new ally, Bluntgirl [Jennifer Schwalbach Smith]. Bluntgirl defeats Lipstick Lesbian and begins to show romantic interest in Bluntman. Chronic grows jealous and voices a desire for a more intimate connection; Bluntgirl agrees to this, though the encounter that follows remains a non-graphic, implied moment. A sly line is dropped: “> Yeah, when Ben Affleck played Daredevil.”
> During the credits, it’s noted that Jay and Silent Bob will return in Clerks III.
After the credits, Stan Lee Stan Lee pays a visit to speak with them about the “Avenger Initiative,” and shortly after, they’re all picked up by Doc Brown Ralph Garman, who asks for their help in getting back to the future.
