Conrad Birdie, Jesse Pearson, a popular rock and roll superstar, receives an Army draft notice in 1962, shocking his teenage fans across the country. Despite his doctorate in biochemistry, Albert F. Peterson, Dick Van Dyke, a down-on-his-luck songwriter, teams up with his secretary and long-suffering girlfriend Rosie DeLeon, Janet Leigh, to stage a plan that could change their lives. They aim to have Conrad perform a song Albert writes, One Last Kiss, on The Ed Sullivan Show and then kiss a randomly chosen high school girl goodbye before joining the Army. The whole scheme is meant to set Albert free to marry Rosie, while his widowed, meddlesome mother Mama Mae Peterson, Maureen Stapleton, keeps a watchful eye on the family’s dynamics.
Columbus, Ohio, is chosen as the venue for Conrad’s farewell. The lucky recipient of the televised moment is Kim MacAfee, Ann-Margret, a cheerful high school girl who is delighted, though her sweetheart Hugo Peabody, Bobby Rydell, feels uneasy about the growing fame that surrounds her. The teens of nearby Sweet Apple fill the air with chatter during the “Telephone Hour,” debating Kim and Hugo’s pinned status and the changing pace of their lives, with Kim expressing a sense of growing up in the popular number How Lovely to Be a Woman.
When Conrad arrives, the town’s mood shifts as the teenagers belt out We Love You Conrad, while the boys grimace and chant We Hate You Conrad! Sweet Apple rides a wave of attention, and even adults become drawn into the spectacle; Conrad’s performance of Honestly Sincere and his hip-thrusts cause many women to swoon, including the mayor’s wife. Under pressure from the town’s leading citizens, Harry McAfee, Paul Lynde, the skeptical father, pushes back on the kiss, until Albert promises that the whole family will be on Sullivan’s television broadcast, revealing a future that could benefit them all. Albert also discloses his other invention—a miracle supplement for domestic animals that would make a hen lay three eggs a day—and the family tests it on their pet tortoise, a moment that brings a comic, urgent energy to the plot.
Harry, a fertilizer salesman, begins to see a path to financial success through Albert’s device, while Hugo tries to protect his romance with Kim. Rosie, feeling unappreciated by Albert, tries to keep their relationship afloat with a quick, hopeful push toward happiness in the song Put on a Happy Face. Mae continues to insert herself into every plan, and the family’s tensions rise as they navigate the delicate balance between ambition, love, and duty.
Rehearsals intensify as Conrad accidentally shares a kiss with Kim during a moment that tests everyone's nerves, and the broadcast is held up by a different ballet number, delaying the much-anticipated farewell. Albert scrambles to maintain control, but a twist of fate pulls him toward Maude’s Madcap Café, a local hangout where Mae hosts card games with Mr. Maude, Milton Frome, and where Rosie seeks a night away from the pressures of their entwined lives. Rosie eventually hatches a plan to reclaim Conrad’s spotlight on The Ed Sullivan Show that evening, slipping one of Albert’s pills into the orchestra conductor’s milk to speed up the ballet, which amuses the audience, offends the Russian ballet troupe, and catapults Conrad back into the broadcast agenda with One Last Kiss.
The live moment turns chaotic when Hugo bursts onto the stage and punches Conrad just as he is about to kiss Kim, delivering a shocking moment to Albert and Rosie. In the aftermath, Kim and Hugo reconcile, and Albert finds the freedom he sought to marry Rosie, while Mae reaches a personal milestone of her own by agreeing to marry Mr. Maude. The town settles into a hopeful, satisfying ending as three couples—Kim and Hugo, Rosie and Albert, and Mae and Mr. Maude—look toward a future that promises happiness. The film closes with Kim bidding a fond farewell to Conrad in Bye Bye Birdie (Reprise), a bittersweet curtain that underscores the bittersweet pull of fame, family, and love.
